by angelica
whereas poor blanche always depended on the kindness of strangers I did so on the kindness of my friends. to cook for me, to help me mend clothes (helping means they would have to do it, of course), to explain to me various things ‘domestic’.
lately I noticed that my NDS syndrome seems to inspire certain behavioral patterns in my VS+ (very domestic) friends in spite – or maybe because? – of my obvious symptoms. for example: the innocent remark to a homemade soup elicits the statement “oh, this is easy to make, I’ll show you.”
NO, you don’t!
sometimes they don’t even wait for an answer and go on to tell me anyhow on how to do it by pouring a bucketful of chinese gibberish into my ears. “sauté the onions”, “scald the milk”, “heat oil in large skillet” – how am I supposed to understand that?
a month ago a friend came visiting, went into my kitchen and put a black thing on my stove. a gift , he said and it was, as I learned, called an iron pan.
I got instructions, they sounded easy enough, and I then looked at the pan for the next few weeks with a mixture of dread and temptation until I finally decided it was time to maybe fight NDS.
first try: smoke alarm went off, experiment was stopped.
second try: everything went well until I added the ready-to-go-come-out-of-bottle teriyaki sauce. as it turns out you don’t heat the sauce up in the hot pan but add it later.
third try: I didn’t realize you have to cook the rice first.
fourth try: I managed to prepare a meal consisting of tofu cubes with precooked rice (my neighbor cooked the rice for me), flavored with teriyaki sauce.
I’m eating rice with tofu and teriyaki for a month now and am considering asking my friend for another recipe because it starts to get a bit boring…..
I think I may have just taken the first step to eventually overcome NDS.
3 comments:
WHEW! You have no idea how relieved I am to have found this site. I thought I was alone. At first I tried to hide the fact that I'm domestically challenged, but it was like trying to hide an elephant under the bed, it just couldn't be done. I must have a pretty severe case. I won't even mention cleaning or sewing, one can survive without those skills, but if you happen to find yourself alone and hungry what do you do?
I'm a woman with above average intelligence, I hold several advanced degrees, am well respected and sought out in my professional life, so I should be able to feed myself, right?
Let's face it, women who are not very bright can cook delicious and varied meals for families and friends. To add to my shame, even MEN can do it; so how hard can it really be?
I tried the stove but after I get the can open (and you don't even want to know how long it took me to master the can opener) and pour it in that pot thing, I put it on the stove and wait for my delicious self-made meal of soup. Twenty minutes later it is still cold. Another fifteen minutes and no heat. What am I doing wrong? Finally I figure out I have neglected to turn on the thing under the pot that makes it hot...I forget what it's called. I'm so proud to have solved this problem on my own, I now think I have this cooking thing down. Imagine my dismay when the damn soup still isn't even luke warm. But wait, I feel heat, then I discovered I turned on the thing that goes under the pot that makes it hot....but there are four of these things and I have turned on the wrong one. I'm getting closer.
Now I know it's just a matter of time before I have my delicious meal of soup, so in preparation I take a bowl from the cupboard and set it on the stove next to the pot of soon to be steaming hot soup. I'm so hungry my mouth is now watering. Thinking of that old adage about how a watched pot never boils...now I know exactly what that means...I decided to sit down and relax with a book while I waited. Several minutes later I heard this loud crash, and I looked up just in time to see the burnt shards of my soup bowl exploding from the stove top. At this point I probably should have called in a professional, but shaking, I very cautiously approached the stove to investigate the situation. Some of the pieces of the burnt bowl had actually melted the vinyl where they landed on the floor. Now I'm no Sherlock Holmes, but as best I could tell, I had yet again turned on the wrong heating thingie, which turned out to be the one I'd set the bowl on rather than the one on which the still cold soup pot rested. Realizing had I not walked away from the stove to relax, I could have been severely injured, possibly even killed had I been closer to ground zero. I had no idea that cooking could be so dangerous. I've learned my lesson and the only thing I will ever again make for dinner will be reservations, or a phone order. For emergencies thank goodness I'm taking a course in the operation of a microwave for heating frozen dinners. After I take the advanced session I will, under supervision at first, be ready to do microwave cooking.
I guess the point I'm trying to make here is that your site is extremely useful in educating people about this syndrome but as my story illustrates, it should by no means be taken lightly. It is a very serious, debilitating, and yes, LIFE THREATENING condition.
Joan
Fortunately, it seems that NDS skips a generation. As the daugher of an NDS, I had no exposure to typical household management tasks as a child. Nonetheless, I have developed exceptional domestic skills for one who is self-taught. These skills allow me to prepare fantastic meals for myself and others, make minor clothing repairs, sew curtains or other needed items, and remove all manner of stains.
Despite the claims of NDS sufferers that I know, these skills have not impaired my intellectual abilities!
Sandie
dear joan,
thank you SOOOO much for your comment - it is always good to hear from other NDSs!
and do i know about turning the wrong thing on on the oven!
i mostly have covers on them, metal things with nice pictures.
i get them from the 99 cent store (99 cent for two!) because it seems that whenever i try to use the stove one gets brown.....
hang in there girl!
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