How to Charcook Aparagus

Fill bottom of pot with water.

Put steamer in.

Put asparagus in.

Put on stove, turn knob to "medium low".

Leave kitchen and forget about it.

When you happen to come back to kitchen hours later, the asparagus will be perfectly crisp and black.

Serve.

DISCLAIMER - IMPORTANT PLEASE READ

It has come to our attention that there has been some confusion between our subject, NDS (No Domestic Skills) and another all to common condition, NBS (No Brain Syndrome). I'm calling it to your attention to avoid any confusion the similarity might cause.

Symptoms for NBS include: vacant eyes, confusion, inability to use or comprehend language, acting irrationally among other things. Below is a picture of NBS in its most severe form. As you can see it is a very different disorder, and it's unfortunate that they have a similar acronym.

Beware The NDS Restaurant!

by angelica

as you might know i am in the city for a few days. this morning a friend and i went for breakfast in brooklyn. and it was so bad that i need to mention it here.
first the hostess tried to seat the people behind us before she seated us. then it took a half hour for the food to come out of the kitchen - only to be served to the people on the neighboring table. after they realized that they didn't order it the waitress took it away, brought it back into the kitchen, turned around and served it to us. when my friend pointed out that it is actually illegal to take food from other people's tables and serve it again she said they will fix new food but it'll take a while...
i asked for a refill of coffee and instead of getting a refill she brought me a new mug. i stirred my milk in and it turned out that an old lable from a honey bottle was floating IN the coffee. i still think they did it on purpose. the manager did not apologize, she just said that they are "having a bad day". not as bad as tomorrow when i'll alert the health inspectors!
beware this one: "two boots" on 2nd street just off 7th avenue in park slope, brooklyn.

Was It Her Fault?

by angelica

hi folks, i'm down in the city for a few days and happend to chance upon this window display up on madison avenue. now i am wondering if it wasn't my mother's fault that i am not more skillful in the kitchen because she never gave me one of these little toy kitchens to play in...

if that's the case she would of course not be able to answer the question on that wonderful mother's card that joan found.

i will keep you posted about what she said...

I found the perfect mother's day card!

Front of Card

keep scrolling

for

Inside of Card

How To Make Spaghetti Sauce:

A Ray of Hope

It may seem like a small thing to those of you who don't suffer with NDS, but every step gives hope to those fellow sufferers.

My friend came over and wanted a cup of tea. Of course tea is made by putting the cup of water in the microwave right? Just as I was about to do this the electricity went out. My friend said I could just boil the water on the stove. I felt the panic rising, but always wanting to at least try to be a good hostess, with shaking hands, I filled a pot with water, put it on the stove, turned on the flame, and in a few minutes the water boiled and I poured it into the cup over the tea bag.

Do you realize what a breakthrough this is?!? I MADE BOILING WATER FROM SCRATCH!